Tuesday, October 16, 2007
SPIRITUAL TEMPER TANTRUMS
1 Peter 2:2-3 "Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good."- The worship arrangements are just not what they think they should be.
- They have never liked one single preacher the church has ever hired.
- They are the ones that constantly cry, "So-in-so hurt my feelings (or did something I didn't like) so I'm just going to quit coming to church."
- "But we've never done it like this before."
- They whine, "I don't like the decision the church leaders made about this, so I'm withholding my contribution to show my displeasure."
Unfortunately, churches everywhere are spending too much of their time trying to deal with these "two year old" adults and their spiritual temper-tantrums, instead of trying to reach the lost around them. When will we catch on that God says it's about unity, growing up and becoming mature spiritual adults.
So my advice to those adults who are continually throwing these spiritual temper-tantrums because something isn't the way you like it, is the same advice I tell my little boy when he throws a fit ... "Grow up, you're acting like a big baby."
Labels: Spiritual Growth
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20 Comments:
Trey,
great blog. Unfortunately, instead of nurturing and helping those spiritual babes to grow, we tend to coddle them and place them in the Romans 14 catagory - the catch all net of the "weaker brother". I may be wrong, but I am not sure someone who has been a "Christian" for 50+ years can qualify under Romans 14 for the weaker brother program. Seems to me their interest rate isn't maturing like it is suppose to.
Just random thinking....
keep praying, seeking and serving
Rats ... all this time I was looking forward to being out of ministry so I could throw some of those tantrums! Now you're telling me I shouldn't?
I do appreciate the fact that the elders where I spent the past 14-1/2 years decided to no longer give credence to the spiritually immature tantrums. They tell the person, "Show us in the Bible where we are in error on this decision and we'll talk." That stops most of it. The people still whine, but they find no ear among the leadership.
OUCH! Very good post. It should step on toes and hearts.
Monalea
Great post, and yes, they are every where. We all need to grow up more.
Sad but oh too true. I always have this picture of Satan jumping up and down and high-fiving his demon cohorts when he can keep us focused on this kind of stuff instead of what we are supposed to be focused on.
Another thing I have noticed is that when we don't accept and understand that God desires to be in an intimate relationship with us personally and that we have to pursue that relationship and work on it, it is much easier to get caught up in what we don't like about the methods of the moment.
But when we get it and our longing is to be in relationship with our Father we just cherish the time we have with HIM, be it in a corporate assembly or in our own private time with HIM.
AMEN!
It hurts the church when people leave becasue things don't go the way that they want them to go. We have to be careful not to get the "it's all about me", too much of that going around!
Very good post and I agree wholeheartedly. My only question is that if a person continues to be divisive, at what point do we just tell them (politely) to "find a new church?" I believe that this is a biblical principle that churches are afraid to approach, but I believe it is needed, especially with so much divisiveness around. I would be very interested in an answer to this question. Blessings.
I like the rule "Only complain if you have at least one solution to offer and discuss."
Why is it that the biggest complainers always know all the problems but NEVER have any solutions?
Excellent!
With your permission, I'd like to post this on my blog.
Trey,
Great post, and i agree...mostly.
I think we have a tendency to draw lines around individuals or issues and lump them into categories, and many times this is unfair to the individual AND the issue. I know many good brothers and sisters that have brought legitimate, biblical concerns to light and have been marginalized because it was determined that they were being divisive. When, in fact, just the opposite was true, and they were striving to establish unity with the word in all love and sincerity. I know that sincerity is not a measure of correct faith, and I CERTAINLY know that I have been very sincere and very wrong at the same time.
However, I feel like that we have gradually lost the art of listening, and because of that lost art, we have silently encouraged those "whiny" brethren. I think we owe it to our brothers and sisters to listen to their concerns without applying our filters to their words. If people feel that you are actually listening, and hearing their concern/gripe/whine, then you have already diffused half of the problem.
Having said that, we need to take the opportunities presented to us to show love and grace, and correction when needed. That correction of a "wrong" or "whiny" sibling needn't be harsh, and that person needs to experience this love and grace through our instruction.
that's my two cents...
Keep writing! You have a wonderful blog and it is part of my regular reading.
Jerry - I'm all for the weaker brother argument, but your right, some abuse it.
Greg - obviously very wise elders. And they handled things very biblically.
Hi Mrs Kim - Satan loves our fighting, back-biting and complaining.
Gord - Great thoughts and always a difficult question. I think it's VERY possible to disagree and still be unified. But when one gets to the point that they are divisive something has to be done. Titus 3 gives us a perfect example of how someone who is making trouble. Verse 10 says to warn the one who is divisive, if he continues to warn him a second time. If he continues to be divisive to have nothing to do with him and don't be around him. That's Paul's plan on how to handle them.
NB - You asked a question that can never be answered. It's the toughest question of life ;)
Jeff - You're always welcome to use anything...
Coy - It's okay to agree "mostly." HA. I agree with you on your thought, but there is a big difference in regular complainer and someone who has a problem or issue with something. We should take everyone’s concerns seriously and listen closely, but there are times when the same person has his 8th gripe that day ... it's a little much to take. And as Greg said above we should always want to see if someone is bringing something that is biblical to you.
There are just some who feel like it is there "talent" to whine, gripe and point out problems. Those talents should be buried in a hole and covered up.
Thanks Coy for bringing up a great point.
Whhaaaaa! My traditions are better than yours.
This kind of stuff sure runs rampant across our brotherhood.
Do you know what the worlds easiest job is? Critic. But there sure seems to be enough of that going on. Why is it that I waste my time doing that? I keep looking for a verse that gives me permission to criticize, and I can't find it.
It sure is alot more productive to encourage others than to criticize the preacher for rearranging the pews or going 20 minutes long.
Trey, I look forward to meeting you someday! God Bless you and the other person that may read this.
I watched a couple attempt to console a kid throwing a tantrum in the mall last week. It was unbelievable. The kid was screaming, annoying everyone, stomping, yelling at mom and dad. I don't know which looked more pathetic, the kid, or the parents who appeared clueless in terms of how to handle the situation. My 14 year old said, "I know what you'd have done if I acted like that." I told him, he probably did . . . once. Not only do the babies need to grow up in our churches but the leaders need to lead--sometimes a kid just needs a stiff rebuke, a bit of discipline to change behavior, or else he will still need his diaper changed when he's 28.
Thanks, Trey!
Ben Overby
http://newgenesis.wordpress.com
Great reminder Trey. I remember that I used to be one of those types of Christians and it wasn't too long ago. I thank God I was able to break through that barrier. I never realized how much it hindered my growth until I was able to bust free from it.
Thanks man.
one observationist:
That takes a real strong person to be able to see something like that in yourself. That's very admirable (a) that you recognized it; (b) that you admitted it; and (c) that you did something about it.
Perhaps if those throwing the spiritual temper tantrum received a spiritual spanking, they would grow up? Just a thought
Peace
Neva
Trey,
It was good to hear from you today.
Great blog and for the most part I agree with you. Some people are just born whiners but, some people are hurting inside and cannot let out what is hurting them. We need to take that into consideration when we think that they are just whiners. There may be other pain there that we need to help with if we would just open our eyes. I know it is frustrating sometimes but we need to try to see it from their side too.
Tell your lovely family hello and you all stay in touch.
You have convinced me I'm a whiner. Thanks, I think.
I find that the danger lies in the fact that I think MY tantrums are totally acceptable and legitimate and not really tantrums at all. They are righteous indignation, by golly. Of course, when that other whiny person does it, well, they just need to get a grip, don't they?
Stupid plank in my eye. :)
This actually fits in quite nicely with my theory about Cherrios Christianity. There's the whole "start with milk, move to meat" thing, just like with babies. And somewhere in the middle, what do you give them? Cherrios. Good transition food, not so great as a staple for the rest of your life. But there we (and I include myself there sometimes) sit in our buildings, munching on Cherrios and throwing nissy fits.
Maybe I'll get my head on straight one of these days.
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