Friday, May 02, 2008
THE MANLY MAN BIBLE STUDY
We've been trying to come up with a name for our men's Bible study that meets in my garage on Thursday nights. Some mentioned "Testosterone Night" and "Men's Night Out," but I think we're going with the "Manly Man Bible Study." All that matters is that 15 to 18 men show up on Thursday nights wanting to figure out how to become better Christian men and fathers.
Last night's study was a good one on how men deal with lust. We studied about Joseph (who was successful at overcoming temptation) and Samson (who failed when it came to lust). It was a tough and touchy topic for men, but very relevant. I had worried about some of the guys skipping out on this subject, so for fun I had challenged them to bring something for show-and-tell. The homework assignment was to bring something with them that represented manhood, manliness or made them feel like a man. My only rule was that they had to keep it rated at least PG-13 in nature. All I can say is that I'm glad I made the rule because the testosterone was thick in the garage last night.
A few of the things that showed up for show-and-tell were heavy equipment like a skid loader and a bulldozer, a garden hoe, pictures of kids and family, an iPhone, a jock strap, fishing pole, weights and the others things I can't mention here. Each man got up and talked about what it means to be a man to them. When we were through we voted on who had the best show-and-tell item. The man that won had talked about a picture that his young son had drawn at school. It said on the picture, "I love God and I love Jesus." He went on to explain that his son drew that picture because they had recently started going to church again after a long layoff. He was proud of once again being the spiritual leader in his home. I was a little choked up and thought, "Now that's a real manly man." We all voted, and he won the prize of a new bible for his show-and-tell item.
Next week's homework assignment is to do something romantic for your wife, but it cannot be or lead to anything sexual in nature. I'm already anxious to hear about next week's homework assignment.
Here are a few pictures of men presenting their manly show-and-tell item.
Last night's study was a good one on how men deal with lust. We studied about Joseph (who was successful at overcoming temptation) and Samson (who failed when it came to lust). It was a tough and touchy topic for men, but very relevant. I had worried about some of the guys skipping out on this subject, so for fun I had challenged them to bring something for show-and-tell. The homework assignment was to bring something with them that represented manhood, manliness or made them feel like a man. My only rule was that they had to keep it rated at least PG-13 in nature. All I can say is that I'm glad I made the rule because the testosterone was thick in the garage last night.
A few of the things that showed up for show-and-tell were heavy equipment like a skid loader and a bulldozer, a garden hoe, pictures of kids and family, an iPhone, a jock strap, fishing pole, weights and the others things I can't mention here. Each man got up and talked about what it means to be a man to them. When we were through we voted on who had the best show-and-tell item. The man that won had talked about a picture that his young son had drawn at school. It said on the picture, "I love God and I love Jesus." He went on to explain that his son drew that picture because they had recently started going to church again after a long layoff. He was proud of once again being the spiritual leader in his home. I was a little choked up and thought, "Now that's a real manly man." We all voted, and he won the prize of a new bible for his show-and-tell item.
Next week's homework assignment is to do something romantic for your wife, but it cannot be or lead to anything sexual in nature. I'm already anxious to hear about next week's homework assignment.
Here are a few pictures of men presenting their manly show-and-tell item.
QUESTION ... we need your help. Can you give me (and a few other of the men readers) some suggestions on ways to be romantic this week?
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33 Comments:
The study sounds great! I'm a bit envious.
Have a great weekend.
Grace and peace,
Tim
Do something TOTALLY unexpected, but EXTREMELY thoughtful for her.
Examples:
-clean the house for her (or hire someone else to do it)
-arrange for the kids to go to a sitter and take her out (maybe out of town, like to Wellington to the movie theater)
-plan an outdoor picnic in the late evening, just before the sun goes down.
-send all of the ironing, if she usually does it, to the cleaners or, even better, DO IT YOURSELF!!!
-Take care of a chore she's been asking you to do for a while, especially something around the house.
Okay, I seriously could go on and on, but I think my point is if it is UNEXPECTED and THOUGHTFUL it will be a total hit!!!!
I LOVE this Bible study you guys are doing!! Is it too late for someone (not mentioning any names) to join?
Oh, and I loved your comment on my last post! Made me laugh out loud. And it is ironic because every time I post about the fertility stuff, I think about my male readers, especially you, and wonder what you must be thinking! I will consult with Richard and maybe I can convince him to be a "guest" on my blog, like Lea was on yours! Then, he can write all about breaking his colt, his new Diesel truck, working cattle, building bridges, and all that other manly stuff! Thanks for reading!
Trey - I'm so glad you post daily...because during this week of TAKS I'm always looking for something to read! Always great stuff at your blogsite. I wish my husband would come to your bible study...it sounds like such a great time to connect with men friends and get the male perspective on life's struggles and successes. Thanks for posting interesting topics...I recommend your blog to everyone I know!
I know you dont know me, but I absolutely love to read your blog. Suggestions on what to do for your wife that is romantic. I think Cowgirl at heart hit it right on the mark. First thing that came to mind, me being a stay at home mom, is for him to clean something around the house, without being told to. Isnt it funny how before you get married the things you think are romantic totally change after you are marriend and have kids? hehe Another suggestion, give her a card, not a funny card, a mushy one. Or even better, right her a love letter. Tell her how much you appreciate her and list the things she does that really mean a lot to you. Hope that helps!! :]
Brie normally comments here. I hope she does today so I can get some good ideas. Is it truly romantic if I don't always come up with the ideas?
Great study by the way. Glad to see you guys getting a man spiritual "tune up" in your garage!
it's good to know what your wife really wants.
if she likes gifts and surprises, a card for no reason, and maybe a gift card for coffee.
if she prefers acts of kindness, cleaning or watching the kids so she can do something else are appreciated
it's alot easier to buy something, but this is usually better
Normally when I go to bible studies the last thing I want is more homework, but it sounds like you give out homework every week that allows the manly men to grow and is also fun.
How about cooking together, either at home or taking a class one night.
Here's a website I found for you with all sorts of suggestions just a click away!http://www.rom101.com/random.htm
Trey,
Keep up the great work you are doing for men!
Mike Ellis
A handwritten letter sent through the mail...
A phone call asking for a date (that the husband plans completely)
Tickets to the Bristol night race!!!
Find a quiet place to talk and LISTEN to your wife!
I would pay CLOSE attention to any suggestions given by women! I like both "cowgirl at heart" and "that girl"'s comments ... well, my wife would not care much for the tickets to Bristol, but I "that girl" and she loves racing.
On another note, thank you for not posting a picture of the man sharing his "show and tell jock strap"!
I second or third or however many have already suggested a date that he plans from start to finish
One of the most romantic things my husband does with me is to pray with me. Especially, when we are on our knees together in prayer. It is just such a reminder to me that he is being very intentional about being the spiritual leader in our home.
I can't begin to explain how romantic it is when my husband picks the things that he KNOWS I hate to do and does them for me.
Guys, nothing says "I love you" louder than when you take away some job your wife despises, even if it's just for one day. We like to be spoiled sometimes. It doesn't have to be a big huge gesture, either.
Super-fantastic idea for that lovely mother of your children: let her sleep in while you chase the kids and watch some cartoons. Breakfast in bed later is a super-bonus.
Those are all things that Kyle alrady does for me, so I guess he'll have to figure it out on his own. :-D
For me the most romantic thing would have to be...(drum roll b/c it's a hard one guys)...be interested in what your wife is doing and who she is. Take the time to ask her questions and then give more than a one word response makes a huge impact. Also, taking time to just think of her when she isn't around is way romantic (i.e. a phone call from work, an email, a note on her mirror) I guess the home-run is a date night that the hubbie sets up - especially those overnight dates (even the Motel 6 can be romantic if you throw a few candles in your suitcase)!!! =)
Trey...I love this study. We are actually starting one for women in Levelland using some of the books Lea suggested! Keep it up!!!
I really appreciate your post and all the comments. I now finally understand "romance" and what it means to be "romantic":
Do-
WHAT
WHEN
HOW
WHERE
WHY
She WANTS in life and romance spontaneously combusts.
Ahhh, spring and romance when a young woman's fancies turn inward and self-centered. ;)
I hope all the husbands out there are paying attention, taking some notes and getting some ideas.
I think anything unexpected (but pleasant) is romantic.
Vacuuming the floor is a great one.
What would I want my DH to do? Give me cash, take me shopping and actually STAY to give his feedback on what I'm trying on. I've lost count of the number of times I've popped out of the fitting room to get his opinion only to find he's on the other side of the store somewhere on HIS PHONE!!!!!
Romantic idea - Give your night 3 hours in the house all to herself. Instruct her cleaning is NOT an option. Draw her a bath and leave the house with the kids.
Second: Seriously, shorts???? Are they any jobs down in TX for a teacher and factory worker!
Third: What are flights from WI to TX costing? Think my husband could fly down Thursday nights so he can do this study. We don't even have 15 Christian men in our congregation.
oh trey it sounds like it was quiet interesting... glad i was at home! man I am soo excited to hear of the homework... wonder if my man will do it? he is NOT the romantic kind? can't wait!
Lightening ... you made me laugh. I love giving Lea comments about clothes she tries on, but she never likes my comments. I'm usually saying, "That dress is too long."
Fillmycup - Come on down. We've got room for your husband in the bible study too. We can find a teaching job, but we're not around any factories.
Haley ... loved the website.
That Girl ... you sound just like Lea. Bristol tickets WOULD be very romantic to her.
Greg - You are welcome. It was a life altering ordeal!
Kim - Honestly, I never feel closer to Lea than when I'm praying with her.
Brie - I'll make sure Kyle stops back by and reads these items.
dmjenkins - You are a wealth of information. I'm getting the idea from all you girls that you like the men to take care of the details.
Get a babysitter.
Turn off the TV.
Cook dinner for her.
Clean the dishes.
Talk about your marriage.
Trust me on this one.
This is probably a bit obvious.... but tell your wife that you love her.
Some men seem to have a probem with those three little words.
David
Leave her with a kiss every single time you leave her. And then kiss her when you return.
Bring back those memories from your dating days.
Trey, it sounds like this Bible study going fantastic...wish I could be there to be a part of it!
To go along with what a lot of the others have said, do something unexpected, and then let her discover that you did it on her own.
Instead of saying, "love you" say "I love you".
Take her out in public and make her feel like she is the only woman on the planet.
Look deeply into her eyes, tell her she is beautiful,
Take a walk down memory lane...bring up something you remember about her from early in your relationship. Women love details! They especially love it when their man remembers details from special times in their relationship.
Touch her every chance you get. Hug, hold hands, rub her shoulders, rub her feet, play with her hair, gently touch the tip of her nose, etc.
Tell her how you feel about her!
Romance doesn't have to cost a cent but it creates great dividends!
And women, remember, men like it when their women are romantic too!
I like the handwritten note but I am not as big on "snail" mail as is That Girl.
We used to have a little dog that we would hide where the other would find it unexpectadely....it was a way to know that he was thinking about me and cared enough to give me a little surprise. I have found it in my purse, in my pillowcase, in my underwear drawer in my shoe.....just fun spontaneous places....
Chocolate, chocolate, and more
chocolate!
I just thought of another one...I love it when my DH touches me when I'm not expecting it. For example, I'm cooking dinner, and he walks by and pats me on the back side or rubs my back as he walks by. Nothing major, just acknowledging my presence and saying "I love you" with his touch.
The romance thing does go both ways, of course. Same principle (other person FIRST), slightly different application.
For example, in our nerdy household, I'm pretty sure that one of the most romantic things I do for my husband is to give up the good computer so that he can run heroic dungeons without lag.
Sometimes love means giving up the good video card.
The fact that I learned to play his favorite video game (and really have fun playing it) so that we could game together probably helps, too.
Romance also means encouraging him to keep up the weekly hang out night with the guys (the same ones he has hung out with since high school) and not giving him grief about it, sending him out to watch all the movies that he is geeked up about but that we can't both get away to go watch, and telling him how cool he is for being able to resurrect a computer by the cunning use of duct tape and chewing gum.
Geek love. It rocks.
Love the Bible Study group name! I think in terms of doing something thoughtful it should be based on the wife's love language :)
1) words of affirmation
2) quality time
3) receiving gifts
4) acts of service
5) personal touch
For me it is acts of service so having the house cleaned for me would make my heart sing but for someone else it could be flowers, jewelery, a romantic date night out...
I didn't read all the comments (for once), but I always recommend bragging behind her back about how great she is. If you do it enough, it will get back to her and it works like a charm for me!
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